Culturally we're not comfortable, even with close friends, commenting on red light warning signals. We're more sensitive to causing offence and being rebuked than asking the question. #RUOK?
When I dropped some weight recently, a few people remarked that I should be careful not to go too far. Well intentioned, but as it was all pretty much visceral fat I was more than comfortable. I did wonder though. How many people ever remarked as my weight crept up by 20K, and whether I should be concerned. It's not cool to remark on weight gain, even though that's more likely a health issue.
My takeaway. Don't rely on others to ask the RUOK question. It's not that we don't care it's that we fear rocking the boat. As part of my #betterversionproject I'm hoping to tune in more acutely to potential crisis issues and to find the language to assist, even if it means caring less at how it reflects on me.
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